Thursday, February 28, 2008
today i decided on the spur of the moment to stop being a loser and learn how to cycle. haha. thanks to cherie's suggestion accompanied with my recent efforts to learn how to cycle. but thanks to douya's great efforts running after me sweating like a mad pig looking so ridiculous, i finally got it in less than an hour! not very sure how long though. but i'm a newbie at cycling ah and i'm a hazard to east coast park. i banged into many things: railing, tree, bush, cherie, douya and jerrall. sorry. oh ya and lamp post (happy now douya? she says it's not everyday i get to bang into so many things as if i want to!). haha. it's a newbie thing. and i fell down on the grass and grazed my knees in front of like an entire platoon of marching army guys who laughed! zzzz... anyhow i'm quite proud of myself. because i finally got over my fear. and it's quite fun! but really i still think it's very dangerous. oh here is some evidence...
NOT! whateverrr.
four wheel bike no more:)
love you like a sister;
11:22 pm
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
this is so disappointing yet exciting. the gossip girl novel ended with serena and blair at the train station where blair was moving on to yale(i think) and nate missing and the next book is starting on the new lives of this gorgeous triplets that bought over blair's apartment - the carlyles. so there's nothing more about serena, blair and nate! sigh.
so anyway the job interview today was kind of freaky but my interviewer is fixing me days for some assessing period thing so if i don't screw up i would be a part of the zoo team! hopefully ah. haha.
love you like a sister;
11:52 pm
Sunday, February 17, 2008
this year's cny has been a period of spiritual experience. it is very much different from all the past years. suddenly i saw a whole lot more to this world. and in the midst of it all i learnt to appreciate all the little things i have. also, interacting with small kids reminded me of how we've lost our generosity in love and how we've grown out of a simple mind. my niece sheryl and her cousin fernanda who are two little girls just kept drawing pictures for me and pictures of me as they sat and look at me and try to draw me. the feeling is somehow very good. i don't really know how to describe that feeling but it was the same as when i was pasting stickers inside a sticker album with my niece in muar. i think it's this feeling you get when someone is paying attention to something they do or just paying attention to you so fully you can almost see it in their eyes. i like that feeling. and they made my day by just drawing me and writing pamela i love you. haha. i also saw the quirks of the somewhat elderly and started fearing i would become like that in future. this cny though not over has already made me feel kind of queer. yet at the same time lucky to know that maybe my parents aren't that bad to me and my life isn't really that horrible as i always thought it was.
and to my one friend who's down, you'll be stronger when the dark period is over. love is everywhere don't worry about being alone. even small kids can give you love :)
and i finally got a response from the zoo to go down for an interview on wednesday. hopefully all goes well and i get the job!
love you like a sister;
11:39 pm
Friday, February 15, 2008
i guess vday was great afterall :) and i now have a new pet hamster. say hi to mata! she's really adorable.
love you like a sister;
10:03 pm
Thursday, February 14, 2008
it takes some time to adjust myself back from being in malaysia. cny was considered the best i ever had. it wasn't because of the amount of money i got because i didn't get a lot and not like i usually obsess over such stuff. so really it was the experience - a cultural one. being in a pre-war house where my grandmother was born, being at muar river and spotting a crocodile, being in a kampong and knowing how advanced we are all. kind of appreciating what i have. this cny feels a whole lot different and more interesting. i am sad that i forgot to bring my cam along. it didn't occur to me to bring it. oh and of course some family bonding always feels good. to feel more loved too and secretly happy knowing that your dads' laptop password is actually your name and birthday. i was surprised yes. recently my parents seem to be nicer to me and appear like they're more often in a good mood too. my mom actually woke up to heat up soup for me though i was back late. i was more of expecting her to scold me or something or asking me to heat it up myself. i really hope it remains this way. to me, a healthy family relationship is very important.
can't believe it's another vday from last year at wq's house where i met him. this one year has been wonderful. this is the first vday where it holds a different meaning for me. i've learnt to love someone over this past year and i've learnt a lot about myself. love is actually a learning journey. and knowing you can depend on someone gives you a lot of security. feels good :) haha.
it shall be a good day then.
love you like a sister;
3:55 am
Friday, February 01, 2008
it's sad that i keep having these nightmares where my parents were mean to me and i wake to find myself crying just as i was in the dream. it's kind of scary usually when i cry in a dream i don't cry in reality. sigh. anyway my "nets it" is so gone :( it's time to stay at home.
love you like a sister;
1:47 am
